Christopher Lee

Lord of the Hobbit

Gregory House and the Frank Hemoptysis

A Brain Fart About Brain Farts

Not my work....but thought it goes exceedingly well with my blog!

Why I Hated Watching Harry Potter Movies in the Theater

I absolutely hated watching the Harry Potter movies in the theater. Don't get me wrong. I am not criticizing the movies. I had a terrible time because of the other people in the theater. They managed to ruin the experience for me in every one of the eight movies. Here is a list of types of people that I hated.




1) The "This is not how it happened in the book" person

There is always one of these guys around. This individual loves to show off his knowledge by pointing out small nuances and differences between the book and the movie. "Harry wasn't wearing a red shirt in this scene, in the book he was wearing a black one!!" Dude no one cares. This is the movie not the book. There will be differences. Shut up and move on!!!






2) The Chatterbox

At the risk of sounding chauvinistic, I must say this person is more often a female than not. Her objective of coming to the cinema apparently is to talk about topics completely unrelated to the movie and only during the movie. The weird part is that she shuts up in the intermission!!!
WHY??? WHY???? Why would you talk when the movie is playing and then shut up later??? And was talking about what you ate in the morning really that important???






3) The Confused Tom

A***hole of the second greatest caliber (will mention the greatest one ahead). This guy doesn't understand squat! At every juncture he will keep asking his friend what is going on in the movie. ITS A HARRY POTTER MOVIE, NOT ROCKET SCIENCE!!! If you don't understand simple things, odds are my friend that you are a dunce!!!






4) The Explainer

Best friend to the confused Tom. Infact I believe every confused Tom has one "Explainer". This person will clear each and every doubt that his confused Tom has and severely annoy everyone around him in doing so. If by chance there is a "this is not how it happened" person nearby its highly likely that a loud debate may erupt confusing the confused Tom even more and perpetuating the cycle even further!!!






5) The Repeater

This is the a***hole of the greatest caliber. The repeater is a misnomer. It is entirely possible that the person can be "pre-peater", which is even worse. This individual loves to learn by rote certain key dialogues like 'Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean it is not real?'
You see no problem in that right? But wait till he/she starts saying stuff out loud a fraction of a second before Dumbledore says it on the screen. Makes me tear my hair out and shout SHUT UP like Arnold Schwarzenegger from Kindergarten Cop!!


Well that's my experience. Hope you had a better Harry Potter co-audience than I did. :)

Inception on Elm Street

House VS Haley Joel Osment Part 2

Types of RGMCites - A Brain Fart by Ameya Hodarkar

This is an article that I had written for my med school's annual magazine

Of the myriad types of people you may come across in RGMC…..okay I’m lying here. There are only a few kinds of people you may come across in RGMC and by large they can be classified into the following breeds:

1) The Nerd: This is the most successful breed of homo sapiens that RGMC has to offer. A good nerd will often spend a sunny day indoors reading the 108 causes of pyrexia of unknown origin. The nerds are also invariably teacher's pets and sometimes on rare occasions some nerds even manage to get to first name terms with some professors. I won’t say much more about the nerds in this article for two major reasons. Firstly because they have good contacts with the professors and secondly because they are just too boring and monotonous to comment about.

2) The Geek: Do not mistake this breed with the nerd breed. The geeks usually are hopeless when it comes to studying. A geek might not know the full form of the BCG vaccine and might often mistake “mugging” with “buggery”. However a good geek will always be able to tell you the finer differences between a core 2 duo processor and an intel i3. The geeks are rare in RGMC…a dying breed. Some batches may be fortunate enough to have 2 or at the most 3 geeks. Geeks are generally uncomfortable around the opposite gender and may sometimes randomly ask out the class female chick (more on chick ahead) with disastrous consequences of public humiliation. The geeks are sworn antagonists to the lovable jocks (more on jocks ahead).

3) The Dork: A sub variant of the nerd breed. We have evidence to believe that the nerd and the dork evolved from a common ancestor. However where the nerd developed extraordinary cerebral function, the dork pretty much developed nothing…except for maybe massive numbers. A large portion of the masses will comprise of dorks. A genuine dork can always be spotted however by its characteristic calls such as “tum toh mujhe bhool hi gaye ho” or even the quintessential “chal chal tu jah padhai kar”

A dork is a symbiotic creature and spends a large part of its time in groups. Another alternative that a dork has is to stick (I mean literally stick) to a nerd

Sample telephone conversation between a nerd and a dork in love with the nerd:

Dork: Hello

Nerd: Hey…Why did you call??

Dork: Just wanted to hear your voice.

Nerd: You shouldn’t call me like this. I could have finished reading two more pages in this time….goodbye

Dork: Tum toh mujhe bhool hi gaye ho! Chal chal tu ja padhai kar!

4) The Jock: Sub par on intelligence, a jock usually makes up for what he lacks in brains by sheer brawn. Like the Geek the Jock is a dying breed. However it is still more numerous than the geek. Each batch can be expected to have atleast 5 cretins who classify to be jocks. If the nerds are popular among professors jocks are popular among the students. Jocks and geeks are constantly at loggerheads. All jocks consider geeks to be filth who need to be pounded…and all geeks consider jocks to be a**holes (well u might have guessed by now that im a geek). Jocks excel at cricket, bullying, cricket…oh yeah some more bullying and oh I almost forgot…some more bullying. Did I mention cricket?

5) The Chick: The rarest of all breeds. Can also be spelled as Chic; sometimes even Chikat. For a long long time it was debated as to whether the Chick breed is a separate breed or simply a separate gender. Some argued that the chicks are merely good looking variants of the aforementioned 4 breeds. Others argued that not all chicks in RGMC are good looking. Later everyone found out that the “some” were geeks and “others” were jocks and they were all arguing for the sake of arguing.

However comprehensive arguments and long standing discussion did clear some facts. Chicks are now considered a separate breed. All Chicks can also be nerds/dorks/geeks/jocks….in addition to the regular qualities of these groups, chicks exude what we like to call “oomph”. Every batch may have 1-2 chicks. Being a Chick need not mean the person is female or good looking. It is very possible that you may come across a male chick in RGMC. A male chick can often be spotted from a crowd when he utters his characteristic call “aiyya”

6) The Abomination: Finally the Abomination. A chick can also be a nerd/geek/dork/jock. But a chick can never be an abomination. Abominations are variants of dorks. I mentioned before that dorks roam in groups or with nerds. Abominations differ from dorks in being solitary. Most of the time it is the society which converts a dork into an abomination. Halitosis, fetor hepaticus, bad personal hygiene, not washing one’s hands after dressing a case of Fournier’s gangrene may be some of the causes which precipitate a dork into an abomination. If you do come across an abomination be sure to hold your breath for as long as possible and avoid shaking hands.

Well that’s about it I suppose….this is you friendly geek signing off….until next time then….aloha!






If any of the happenings mentioned above seem familiar, it is highly possible that they actually happened in RGMC. It is definitely not a coincidence!! *wink wink*

Joey Tribbiani to Amber (cut throat bitch): How You Doin?

Ultimate Battle: Goku (dragonballZ) VS Ryu (Streetfighter)

Twilight Variations: A Brain Fart by Ameya Hodarkar.

Twilight by Quenton Tarantino:
The cullens, the werewolves and the volturi get involved in an epic battle. Everyone except Bella and Edward dies a gory and gruesome death

Twilight by Chris Nolan:
Bella wakes up thinking it was all a dream. But it was not! Actually there were 2 Edwards pretending to be one. When one of the Edwards is killed, the other goes to the Volturi and takes revenge. All this time bella is stuck in limbo with the joker and Michael Caine.....confused???? so am I and everyone else!!!!!

Twilight by M Night Shyamalan:
It is revealed in the end that bella was the vampire all along. Edward was just a schizophrenic! Also we come to know in the end that vampires cant be killed by sunlight but water dissolves them!

Twilight by James Cameron:
Edward tells Bella that he is a robotic angel sent from future to save her. He then suddenly develops wings and lifts bella. They fly away to a distant planet as earth gets ripped into 2 pieces and is destroyed.

Twilight by Woody Allen:
Bella loves Edward, but she also loves Jacob. when she meets Aro the Volturi leader she realises that Aro was her soulmate all along. She leaves both edward and jacob who then get into a homosexual relationship with each other. Everyone lives happily ever after. This version has a special guest appearance by Woody Allen himself!

Twilight (the 7 part novel series) by J K Rowling:
The Volturi never understood love and that was their weakness. Eventually when Bella sneezed she released copious amounts of love from her nose. The Volturi were overwhelmed by such vast amounts of love and they all died. 19 years later Renesmee is all grown up but still going to school. All other characters are just as they were before. Oh yeah Charlie Swan died of lung cancer and J K Rowling just declared that he was a closet homosexual.

Twilight by David Dhawan/Sajid Khan: Starring: Govinda and Akshay Kumar
Music director: Anu Malik.


Edward: I love you Bella
Bella: I love you too Edward
Elaborate dance sequence breaks out. 

Song lyrics: main tera majnoo tu meri laila.....dhinkachika dhinkachika dhinkachika dhinkachika eh eh eh eh!!!